Spuds MacKenzie Is Rolling in His Grave

The toppy look of Anheuser-Busch’s stock chart (above) implies that the company is at least somewhat likely to lose sales because of its attempt to shove the wretchedly unlovely Dylan Mulvaney down our throats.  Bud Light is undrinkable pisswater to begin with, so perhaps we should not be cheering on the frat boys who made it America’s #1 rotgut, surpassing even Rolling Rock, but giving begrudging credit to the woke schemer in A-B’s marketing department who managed to spin the brand out to the farthest reaches of the galaxy.

Choosing a flaming fruitcake to be Bud Light’s spokeswhatever was the brainchild of a 39-year-old, Ivy-educated provocateur named Alissa Heinerscheid, and there’s no denying that the brewhaha this prank stirred up has made her a hero to half of America. But that still leaves the other half to boycott Bud Light and sundry other products distributed by Anheuser-Busch. The list includes Stella Artois (which, despite its popularity in the U.S., Belgians evidently regard as their pisswater), Monster Energy Drink and a gallimaufry of craft beers.

Dylan’s Journey

It is by no means assured that Anheuser will lose out, let alone that they will cashier Heinerscheid. Before she even hired Mulvaney, the vomitous saga of his regression to faux girlhood had attracted a reported five million gawkers on TikTok. He is a top influencer and arguably unmenacing as long as he’s not chatting up little girls in the schoolyard. Fortunately, Heinerscheid’s reach does not yet extend into our back yards. And it is just possible that overexposure will soon force her and her employer to back the hell off. To support this outcome, here’s a supposed photo of her cavorting with fratty girls at a Harvard party in 2005. Blowing up condoms, admittedly, is unexceptionable behavior for party girls and debutantes who have mastered the intricacies of beer pong. However, if Heinerscheid is the hypocrite she appears to be, this snapshot won’t be the last to embarrass her. It would be ironic if the current It Girl of woke-dom were to experience actual victimhood as, say, the unwitting, debauched star of a faux-video produced by CelebJihad.com, Taylor Swift’s brutal nemesis. Let’s hope she has the good humor to, um, take it in stride.

But I digress. Concerning price action in Budweiser shares, the ostensible subject of this commentary, two weeks ago I’d have made BUD an even bet to test highs near 80 recorded in June 2021. However, the fact that the stock topped precisely at the 66.95 ‘Hidden Pivot’ target shown in the chart warrants a yellow flag as long as Mulvaney has breath enough to flounce, vamp and embarrass the nation. BUD surpassed some prior peaks before reaching the target, and that is bullish. If the unthinkable happens and Heinerscheid’s outrageous gamble produces higher sales for Bud Light, then America is in far worse shape than I had imagined.

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